Introduction
In my junior year of high school, I was drugged and sexually assaulted. In the moments before I lost control to the substance, I felt the intense urge to punch my assailant in the eye. I lifted my fist, wrapped my knuckles tight in my palm, then realized I was not moving at all. I thought I might scream. The sound felt like it was moving through molasses, which filled my whole body. I remember having the thought in the moment that there was no reaction now that could save me. My body must have had that thought before I did, as it shut down entirely. I experienced complete physical and vocal immobility. This response, commonly referred to as the “freeze” response, is a psychological reaction called tonic immobility. Paralysis is frequently reported in the immediate aftermath of sexual assault, yet our socialization delineates the “ideal victim” as the woman who fights her attacker tooth and nail. What happens when our brain, our body, and our socialization send conflicting signals?
When studying physiological responses to a threat, we most commonly examine the sympathetic responses associated with the fight-or-flight response. Sympathetic responses raise heart rate and trigger bursts of energy, enabling the body to either attack or flee with an adrenaline boost that increases the chances of survival. Freezing, on the other hand, is a parasympathetic response that slows the heart rate and promotes energy restoration. Sympathetic responses happen in an instant, while parasympathetic responses tend to take longer to kick in. Why, then, do those who freeze report a sudden loss of mobility? Why, in this specific instance, is a parasympathetic response behaving like a sympathetic one? And what does our society assume about women who “play possum”?
The freeze response differs from the fawn response, which is characterized by appeasement behaviors aimed at calming the aggressor and may involve flattery and compliance. This response often occurs when individuals perceive that resisting could escalate the threat, leading them to attempt to bond with or please the aggressor as a survival strategy. Both responses illustrate how biological and social conditioning influence human behavior in the face of danger, highlighting the complexities of trauma reactions and societal perceptions of survivors. Like the freeze response, fawning is also parasympathetic and involves behaviors aimed at de-escalating a threatening situation.
Why Women Freeze and Fawn
While both men and women are prone to stress responses, women are much more likely to freeze, while men are more likely to fight. There are a plethora of hypotheses as to why, but 2 major factors seem to play the largest part, i.e., biological gender roles and social conditioning towards violence. Biologically and historically, women are primed to respond to threats with a caretaking mindset, which over time became a rigid stereotype, urging women to take up a “break the glass ceiling” mindset.
As the predominant nurturers in their communities, women’s responses are not “escape at all costs,” but “escape with as little harm to my offspring.” We are biologically trained to de-escalate, whether that’s by making yourself immobile or befriending the threat, an explanation for the prevalent “fawn” response, when a victim appeases their assailant at all costs. Women with children cannot fight. You cannot throw a hook with a baby in either arm. Biologically speaking, the average woman will be physically overpowered by the average man. The fact that we are indulging in this thought is in itself problematic, as men and women must be at complementary ends, not comparative ones.
On paper, there is no point in fighting. Men, on the other hand, are not hardwired towards damage control. They are biologically hunters and soldiers. Their survival affects only themselves. Their only goal when responding to a threat is to destroy it, while women must destroy it with as little impact on their environment and family unit as possible. Social conditioning is also a major player to consider. We raise our boys to be strong, brave, and aggressive. We promote playground roughhousing and arm wrestling, crowning the strongest boy the best. Girls, opposingly, are raised towards fulfilling service and caretaking roles. We teach our girls to fit in a box, to make themselves small, to not disrupt. Men are taught to shout, to kick, to deceive, to push for what they want at all costs. Why would women, when faced with a threat, fight? We are raised to be as small as possible. Flailing and screaming and hitting are not dainty. Not in the slightest. Thus, the society indirectly demands raising children who blend gender roles, or the system collapses when more and more people choose not to bear children.
The Model Victim Survivor
A 1990 study by the U.S General Accounting Office states that the perpetrators of serious sexual assault against a White victim were much more likely to receive a harsh sentence than a perpetrator of a serious sexual assault against a Black victim. Racial bias is inextricably linked with our understanding of victimhood. Common rape myths also impact our view of sexual assault as a whole. Victims who did not verifiably fight back against their assailant are less likely to be viewed as credible in the eyes of a jury. Cases in which the victim is perceived as having partaken in activities that raise their blameworthiness (e.g., dressing in revealing clothing, consumption of drugs and/or alcohol, traveling alone/at night, working in “unsavory” fields such as sex work) have also been frequently dismissed by jurors and judges alike.
Keeping this in mind, we start to pick apart why the female victim’s nervous system chooses simply (or not so simply) to freeze. Our biological condition says placate, our social condition says be polite, our body tells us to flee, and our experience with the justice system says we must fight to be believed. Thus, we freeze. Freezing is a highly successful de-escalation tactic for female victims. It is a reaction honed by years of evolution, yet it is the response most frequently scrutinized by jurors. Our contradicting societal conceptualizations of sexual assault make the “model victim” a logical impossibility. Rape myths are so deeply ingrained, not only in our culture but in the institutions of racism, misogyny, and classism. It takes active deconstruction on the part of legal agencies to ensure an unbiased trial for a woman, especially one who’s “high risk” for being labeled promiscuous, stupid, or glib.
Physiological Overload
With all these facts in mind, we can begin to understand what happens in the mind and body that causes women to freeze. Tonic immobility is, in fact, not solely rooted in the parasympathetic or sympathetic responses. It is caused by a strong sympathetic response that triggers extreme muscle tension, which occurs simultaneously with a parasympathetic response that slows the heart rate. The body is quite literally trapped in limbo between two responses, and essentially experiences an overload and ceases normal function. This cessation of function can also help begin to explain the large gaps in memory experienced by trauma survivors. The body is firing on all cylinders to survive, and the brain takes this as a cue that this experience may be more harmful to remember than to forget.
Conclusion
In conclusion, it is a highly effective survival tactic for female assault victims to enter a state of tonic immobility, despite the numerous societal factors stigmatizing the response. The brain, the body, and the culture all work in tandem to inform our response to a threat, and it is important to note that in no instance is a survivor consciously “choosing“ a response. Their body takes over and scans past experiences responsible for conditioning to decide the best route to survival in a matter of seconds. Freezing is not a source of shame; in fact, it’s quite the opposite. A freeze response means your body truly used every single tool at its disposal to keep you alive. Tonic immobility is not a failure to act. It is the most complicated and sophisticated action of them all.
As noted in the introductory paragraph, I experienced a sexual assault during my junior year of high school. I also experienced serious assaults in my childhood and first year of college, and in every instance except the last, my response was to freeze. I have spent a lot of time researching and understanding why my body chose this response, and I believe other survivors would find it comforting to know that the freeze response is not your body’s betrayal, but its gift; a gift of time to choose the next effective move.
References
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Author Bio
Izzy Marie is currently a B. A. student at Marymount Manhattan College and a lifelong lover of writing and journalism. Izzy is also a prominent mental health and sexual violence prevention activist and a political playwright.
Published under the Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0) license for mental health awareness with editorial review.